Guess what these are made of?

Was talking to this gal the other day and noticed she was wearing these beautiful earrings.

Little iridescent spheres resembling tiny sparrow eggs dangling from delicate silver hooks.

Me:  “Those are really cute.”

Her:  “Thanks, I got them while I was on a trip to Alaska.”  “A young man was selling them and I thought they were pretty.” “The funny thing about them is, you won’t believe what they are made of.”

Of course, this piqued my curiosity.

Me:  “Pray tell, what are they made of?”

Her:  “Moose poop!”

Me:  “What the heck???”  “Seriously??”

Her: “Yes, this guy was selling them on the train and I thought they were interesting and so I bought them!”

I now moved in for a closer inspection of the tiny orbs.

Perfect drops of pale violet that resembled miniature Easter eggs.

Me:   “Really? Those are hunks of moose poo?”

Her: “Yep.” “They are covered in paint and varnish so they don’t smell!”

Now if you think I am making this all up, you can Google "moose poop jewelry" and take a look.

Not only can you buy jewelry, but soap, gag gifts and hundreds of other goodies made from the excrement of the might moose.

They also carry products made from deer poop as well.

As my Daddy used to say, “anything to get your money.”

But aside from the obvious fact that you have moose poop hanging from your earlobes, the first thing I thought of when she was telling me this story was about this kids' parents.

Imagine the reaction of Mom and Dad when their son strolls into the living room and exclaims, “Hey folks, I’m quittin’ school and following my dream of being a moose muffin earring crafter!”

The mother promptly faints and as the Dad is reviving her screams, “SEE WHAT YOU’VE DONE?” 

“You’ve given your mother a stroke with all your foolish poop talk!”  “We knew better than to let you take liberal arts in college!!”   “What will she tell her friends at Bunco?”  “That her son has dropped out of school to delve in doo-doo???”  “You’re killing her, YOU’RE JUST KILLING HER!!!”

Then a lot of speculation would follow about his early childhood exposure to Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoons.

Plus when did this idea flash into his brain?

Was he sitting in the forest one day surrounded by dung and suddenly realized he could use this stuff as a source of income?

“Hey, look at all this free inventory!” “I could make some serious moolah  from this!”

“Awesome, dude!”

Hey, I don’t blame him. 

Everybody can use a little extra cash nowadays.

Which gets me to thinkin’…….

I have a new puppy that leaves me "nugget presents" just about every morning in my hallway……

And I have some varnish in the garage…..

I wonder if Petco has a jewelry section?

…….I’m just sayin’