Bunny Mini

Walking to my car on Saturday morning after work and saw this license plate rim on a mini coop.

“This mini brakes for bunnies”

Alrighty then.

Because it was the day before Easter were the rabbits feeling overworked and unappreciated and decide to begin a “Occupy the Freeway” campaign I didn't know about?

So if we are suddenly surrounded by a herd of bunnies I can pretty much be certain this person will stop for them?

I’m so disappointed.
I thought our goal was to plow through them like a bowling ball, scattering those four legged fuzzies in our wake.

I mean after all, they are such vicious creatures.

Did this person think that this was information the general public was sooo interested in that they decided to have a license plate placard made to warn us of their non-bunny slaughtering preference?

Apparently so!

And pardon me for being so obtuse, but what is up with the “Baby on Board” window clings?

“Dag nab it!  I was planning on T-boning that car but now I see there is a BABY in there!”

“That changes everything!!!!”

“Now I need to find another one with just OLD people on board and then I can ram away to my homicidal hearts content without any guilt whatsoever”

“After all, it’s just old people!”

 “Who needs ‘em!”

I am always baffled and amused at the bizarre things people declare to the world on their cars in the forms of vanity license plates, license plate rims and bumper stickers.

Any bumper sticker that tells me to honk for anything immediately tells me this person is a crappy driver.

They just got tired of being honked at and decided to make it a personal campaign.

Honk if you’re horny.

Honk if you love Jesus.

(Hopefully those are not on the same car)

Honk at me cuz I am half blind and just tried to merge my 2 ton car into your drivers side. (See! They could never put that on there)

I also love the signs on the back of commercial vehicles that say, “How’s my driving?”

This is followed up with some phone number to call if this particular Sparkletts truck just tried to flatten you with his crystal clear mountain goodness.

I bet if you called those numbers the phone would be answered by some tired disgruntled janitor back at the plant who says, “Yeah, we know he’s a bad driver and frankly we don’t care.” “We just put that on the back of the truck to make you THINK we care!”

“I will certainly put another tick on the piece of paper where we keep track of this important statistic.”

“It’s in the trash can.”…….

“On a piece of toilet paper.”………

“Thanks for calling!”

But my favorite thing of all is the folks who order a personalized vanity license plate and the message resembles a  J. K Rowlings riddle.

You spend a ton of dough to express your individuality and nobody can understand what the heck you are talking about!

Plus I sit behind you at a light sounding out the letters like a Wheel Of Fortune contestant trying to decipher the puzzle!

I…..M……STEWPID.

OooooH, I GET IT!!

I went to a site called “Vanity Plates: Creepiness in 8 characters or less.”, and found some real artistic gems.

Such as this one.

Obviously they are acquainted with my puppy.

Or this one.

Hey, mind your own business!

As for me, my license plate is not personalized and contains the letters Y ME.

Which is exactly what I am thinking when I am stuck behind someone who is braking for the invisible bunny herds in their mini coop the morning before Easter.

.......I'm just sayin'