Florida Anyone?

I live next to a swamp.

No, I haven’t been teleported to Florida recently, but I am referring to my swimming pool.

Anyone with a pool knows that during the Winter the job of keeping up with this swirling money pit of pleasure is a daunting task.

My pool is a 1950’s style diving pool.  

So basically it’s a well with a diving board.

Except the diving board was removed years ago.

Sigh….

When I first bought my house the pool was a giant green hole filled with water that reeked of slime and decay.   

Kind of like right now…

My Daddy decided that he should troll the depths to see if he could discover any hidden treasures or at least find out how deep it was.

He procured a giant painters bucket , tied a rope to the handle and proceeded to dredge the length of the pool in search of Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio. When this operation failed to uncover any bodies, human or animal, he decided a gaffers hook would be more fun and switched to this fisherman’s tool  of torture to complete this gruesome task.

Nothing…

Nada…

Couple of tree branches and an old tire.

We eventually pumped out all the water, painted the entire thing with pool paint. (whole other story), and refilled the sucker.

Which brings us to today.

If I could I would drain it all out, dump as much junk into it as I could find and fill it in with dirt.

Bet there is some law against that sort of thing.

Whatever…..

As for now, I think I will go try to find some kind of fish to help eat all the algae and the other assorted creatures that live in its murky depths.

They need to be some really BIG fish.

Like Great White Sharks.

Or Beluga Whales.

And I could charge admission so I could buy me a JACUZZI !!

Which would, of course, need someone to clean it so it wouldn’t get nasty…..

It’s a vicious cycle I tell you!

Sigh……

………..I’m just sayin’